ugh

"i was scared. i thought you knew that about me."

"i wish i'd stayed."

"walk back and say goodbye. at least pretend we have one."

saw eternal sunshine of the spotless mind today, for the second time. i've had a couple of odd conversations lately. i guess seeing that movie again was just in keeping with my state of mind these past couple of days.

my favorite line from my so-called life was something like, you can't really hurt someone unless you matter to them. i think that fits in there as well.

people come into your life and you really have llittle control over how deeply they affect you. even if every intention you had was to play it safe with your heart, to keep them out. sometimes they seep in. sometimes you want them to. sometimes you wonder why you fought it so hard in the first place. sometimes you get scared when things begin to go south. you doubt the efforts made. you question every single word. every action. every sign. but you can't scrap it all over one minor mishap. if you did, you'd never get anywhere. that's no way to live. i tell myself that these days. eventually i'll start believing it.