["happy halloween mother fuckers"]

after a quick trip to the grocery store and then back again for some tape ms. B and i started decorating. for some reason i was elected to be in charge of the music. apparently my constant need to be in control of my musical environment is no longer a secret. hmm, maybe it never was. so the two of us started drinking while listening to some maroon5 and x-tina. the place looked really good when we finished an hour later. by the time i had my third beer i was feeling a little buzzed. i found myself standing alone in front of the stereo dancing to the music while ms. B was in the shower. called G to see when she was getting there, then put half of my costume on. i was fighting giving up my flip flops. it was like 75 degrees on october 30th. so i stood on the porch in my army jacket and hat, jeans, and flip flops talking to her. i realized i was still kind of dancing and that the neighbors probably could see me, but for some reason i didn’t really care.

two hours later the house was filled with about 25 people. i found myself flirting with a chicken. considered saying aloud the thought that was in my head, “well i’ve always wanted to have sex with a chicken“, but considered it in my best interest to keep my mouth shut. spent a good amount of time alone in the kitchen with G while the others hung out in the front room and on the porch. got freaked out every time ms. K looked at me with her creepy ghost makeup on. ate my body weight in raw broccoli. yum. and drank about 85 beers. kept losing my camera, that was always found in my coat pocket. that i was wearing. watched as ms. K’s boyfriend began to ride ms. B’s bike throughout the kitchen, dining room and front room. then someone asked him if he wanted to go outside, he smiled and nodded as she opened the door for him, and off he went. out the door, down the steps, and up the street with ms. K chasing after him and ms. B following behind yelling, “happy halloween mother fuckers” to the neighborhood.

as most of the guests were heading for home i decided i was ready for bed so i laid down on the kitchen floor as i was talking to G. i wanted my sleeping bag but it was in the guest room, where ms. K and her boyfriend disappeared to. i said i didn’t want to get my stuff because i didn’t want to walk in on them having sex. ms. B said she didn’t care, and headed upstairs to get my things. she came back to inform us that ms. K was laying upside down in the bed, and her boyfriend was passed out on the floor. we laughed, said goodbye to G, and called it a night.

i woke up this morning on ms. B’s couch having absolutely no idea what time it was. somehow we gained an hour last night, but ended up losing out on five other ones. this morning my watch said one time, my cell phone another, and the cable box something else. i gave up on figuring it out and went back to sleep. an hour or so later the others finally made their way downstairs and i decided to get up. ms. K informed us that she somehow hit her head in the night and felt like she had a concussion.

ms. B: he must have knocked you out so he could have some ghost butt sex with you.
me: maybe he fell to the floor after the dismount?
ms. B: the judges gave it an 8.5

i’d say our little party that we cooked up a few months back ended up being a success. we cleaned up and took all the decorations down. then i headed home, still having no idea what time it really was.