five days, every week

wake up before alarm. set alarm for twenty minutes later. drift off, wake up again. get out of bed. walk to the bathroom. turn water on, sleep for fifteen more minutes. worry about the day before it's even begun. get in the shower. get out of the shower. dry off. brush teeth. walk back to bedroom. get dressed. back to bathroom, put gel in hair. throw lunch together. grab wallet, watch, phone. head out the door. start car. music up, way up. sunglasses on. let out a sigh, drive to work. think back to summers of unemployment. turn left, right, right, left, right, left, left, right, left, right. somewhere in there have a minor panic attack and feel like you're gonna cry. curse dennis for taking your parking spot. wait for the song to end, stalling, then walk across parking lot. think to yourself twenty times, "i can't believe this is my life, i can't believe this is my life." smile when you see lisa. roll eyes at janitor evil. wonder if HR is really sleeping with the "manager", manager in name only. deal with the dumbest people on the face of the earth. mean people. people who can't grasp simple functions like pushing start on a copier. people in the same clothes each time you see them. people missing far too many teeth. see joe, think dirty dirty things. sit down. drink V8 for breakfast. talk tv with p. get molested by supposed authority figure. make audible gagging noises in an effort to make her realize how creeped out you are. wonder why so many people suck, hardcore. make lists. write notes. anything to escape from the boredom, even if only for a few minutes. look at clock, go to lunch. drive to mcdonald's to order iced tea. kick around the idea of not going back to work. smile at lilian as you hand her the dollar fifty. check out cute boys at the car wash. drive back to work. text friends back. eat. return to work. wonder how time stops every day at four. wonder if the clock even goes to five. finally RUN to your car to get as far away as possible. start car. music up, way up. head home. already begin to dread the following day.

lather, rinse, repeat. something like that.