every morning. open the door. look around. realize that it's way too hot, way too humid for 6am, realize that you are way beyond screwed. step outside, survey the parking lot. realize that you're content where you are, but not happy. never happy. a change for the better somehow became a lateral move. or maybe it was a step in reverse, who knows really. all you do know is that you step outside, take a look around, and see the building across the parking lot. always the building across the parking lot. and you're left forever wondering how different your life would have been, would be, had you taken that turn. an early thought, an early craving...and you know you would have, you could have ended up there. an endless open question. what if? could you have? you wonder if you would have? maybe questions is a little more accurate. you look across the parking lot, see the building with the two peaks and feel what little was left of you to begin with slowly die off.