5.30.07

Wednesday:

I finally decide to sit down and watch Alpha Dog which has been sitting here taunting me for close to a month now. It's good. Well written, well acted, and kind of disturbing. I don't know what I was expecting, or why this in any way surprises me, but it does. The fact that they had twenty different opportunities to stop the kid's death from happening and still allow it to go down I guess is what bothers me. I'm still very slowly making my way through Never Let Me Go. It's not in any way bad, just not quite the page turner that the Road was.

5.28.07

Monday:

We shop, we eat, we walk. A lot. Because that’s all my family knows how to do when we’re around one another. I'm seriously thankful that they too like to walk so much, it helps balance out all of the filling of the face. We begin our day at Macy's where I find zip. My mom, my Aunt, and two cousins however have no trouble finding anything. We hit several other shops and I still don't spend any money. I begin to crave a pretzel so we make a quick stop at Auntie Anne's. My mother just happens to have a free pretzel card in her purse. The card looks as if it has been around for quite some time. I joke and ask her if she first got it when I was born and has been spending the last thirty years filling it up. I was excited that I was now the lucky recipient of the free goods. We head to Old Navy and I hit it pretty hard, I don’t remember the last time I visited their establishment. A year? Maybe two. Anyway, I find some jeans similar to ones I’ve seen about town and decide I can’t live without them. I grab two pairs of jeans and two long sleeved shirts to wear under polos, ts and such and make my way to the dressing room. They fit, are all on clearance, and I am out of there. We hit a million other stores, but I am strong and save my money. I do disgust both of my cousins by purchasing some shampoo at Bath & Bodyworks that smells exactly like iced tea with lemon. I mean come on, I think I give off that scent anyway considering how much of it I drink. We stop at Kohl's where I am unable to resist the urge to by some more cute underwear. It was buy one get one half off, how could I not. We bid my cousins farewell and head back to my Aunt's. I spend an hour in the sun working on my tan and reading my book. We eventually make our way over to my cousin's house for a cookout. Little Snickers, their dog, warms my heart as she tends to do. She is both the smallest and cutest thing I have ever seen. We go on a mile walk to my other cousin's house for a brief visit. We then head back to cousin #1's house for more Blurt! Along the way we see two boys hanging out in a driveway. One of the boys heads off on his motorcycle and we walk in the opposite direction. Chels says she knows the boys from school. Snickers walks with us and seriously cracks me up the entire way. As we approach the house several police cars go flying by us, lights flashing. My cousin wanted to surprise me with a DQ ice cream cake but after they drove there, they found it closed because of the holiday. So she whipped up another ice cream surprise for us, waffle bowls. Her husband shortly arrived home from work and told us there was a bad accident involving someone on a motorcycle. We later learn that the kid we saw walking and then driving off misjudged a curve and slammed into a telephone pole. He lived, but they had to amputate on of his legs. This really freaks me out, the fact that we saw him right before it happened. While playing Blurt! Chels gets some texts from one of her friends about the accident. My cousin's husband jokes with her and asks her who could be texting her since I'm sitting right next to her. I inform him that I'm texting her with my butt. My cousin tells him that I have mad skills, and for some reason he walks out of the room shaking his head. We head back to my Aunt's house and she turns on the news to see if they talk about the accident. I discover that Charles Nelson Riley has passed away, thanks to the local Michigan 11 p.m. news, and my fragile little heart breaks. I spent the summer of 2005 falling in love with him and his amazing wit with three daily installments of the Match Game.

5.27.07

Sunday:

We get up early to go to church with my Aunt. I will forever be the teenager who slept in way too late, who took forever in the bathroom getting ready, who oftentimes held everyone else up. Even now when I'm sometimes the first one up. I get up and head to the shower and get ready before breakfast so we won't be late on my account. We sit and talk for a bit while my Aunt makes an insane amount of food for the three of us. We go to church, my mom gets shanghaied into singing a solo. It's a nice surprise because I haven't heard her sing in years. When we were little she used to sing one Sunday a month when we went to church so this of course brings back a lot of memories. When Chels learns of this she insists on telling everyone for the remainder of the day that the song my mother sang was London Bridge by Fergie. I assure her, that it was not. We head back to my Aunt's and have a snack since I'm told lunch won't be for quite some time. I eat a lot of broccoli, cauliflower, and some carrots. My cousin swings by with her two kids, aka my favorite people in the whole wide world, and the three of us quickly make the vegetables disappear. The plate is filled three times, but this does not stop us one bit. Of course lunch is ready in no time at all, and I immediately regret the snackage. I have a barbecue chicken breast that is seriously as big as my face. I don't think it was entirely done, both because it looked pink and because I begin to feel ill later in the evening. After too much food once again, we decide to play a game. Chels brings Blurt into our lives and I repeatedly thank her. It is so much fun, and after I'm initially stressed out by it I begin to really like it. All it is is a series of descriptions and you have to be the first one to yell out the noun of what it is. I find this stressful because my instinct it to wait for the entire description to be read and you tend to lose when you do that. I also have a hard time speaking up, well when I'm sober that is. So the fact that my two cousins are screaming tends to drown out my voice. But I quickly adapt and come close to winning both games. After game time we head outside to do some yard work. My main job is to rake up piles of things and carry them behind the house to the burn pile. This seems to be all that I am qualified for. My Aunt begins to stress out and chases me around the yard telling me to go back inside an read my book. Moments earlier I was inside in the recliner reading, Never Let Me Go, because at this point the chicken was starting to make me feel sick. I laugh and tell my Aunt that what I'm doing is very little work and I really don't mind at all. Eventually I'm promoted to using a wheelbarrow. Then later I am trusted with a saw and I cut down some dead bushes around the house. I'm very handy. We end our day inside when my other cousin comes over with his kids and wife.

5.26.07

Saturday:

After over-packing, something I always do, and loading up my car, my mother and I head for Michigan. I find it impossible not to over pack. I mean when I have full and complete access to my closet I find it hard to make up my mind on deciding what to wear. Often times I change two or three times before heading out. And that’s when I know what the weather is like at that very moment, I’m not planning that far ahead. So when it comes to packing for a trip I always take more than I need and inevitably have the heaviest bag. I'm such a girl. It’s pathetic, but it’s me. Always has been. So we hit Bob Evans on our way out of town for a late lunch/early dinner. Wildfire Chicken Salad, that’s the only thing I’ve ever had there. Yum. The traffic is light, the weather is a bit all over the map. It goes from being sunny, to hailing, to raining, to being sunny, to clouding over all in the span of four hours. We sit around and talk with my Aunt for a bit and then my cousin and her husband show up. She walks in holding something in her hands with a big smile on her face. They were out for ice cream and she picked me up a scoop of Mackinaw Island Fudge in a bowl, put it on ice, and brought it to me. Being very easy to please, this makes my day. My other cousin and his kids then stop over for a visit while I do my best to keep my eyes open and remain upright. It's been 100 hours since my day began at 3 a.m. After 30 years it seems that I now qualify for my own bedroom. I really have no idea how to react to this offer. It is not a stay in Michigan without being put on display in the family room on the pull out bed. I have no privacy. I have no walls of my own. That's just how it's always been. This trip I have my own room where I drift off to a mix I made on my phone. The one catch to the new room is that the headboard to the bed is loose and even the slightest move I make causes the headboard to pound against the wall. This of course sounds like I'm having rigorous amounts of sex. All night long. With myself.

i loved this movie. it was so intense. short. sad. the action started immediately, no time was wasted. and it shook me to the very end. i haven't been this worked up while watching a movie since the descent.


i love this cd. shut up, i know. but after one listen on the drive home today i thought two things: it was worth the wait, and it's the perfect summer sound.


i'm loving this 88 degree weather, for obvious reasons.

5.22.07

Tuesday:

Surreal. Where do I begin? I meet Ms. K for dinner at this great italian place my uncle introduced me to. Since she is coming from work, and it's pretty close to her place, I decide we'll meet there. I remember the service being slow, but the food being delicious, so I figured the good outweighed the bad. Our waitress was a freak, there is no way to put it in a nicer way. The only other explanation for it, outside of her genuinely being a freak, would be that she was seriously strung out on something. I ordered a small pizza and an antipasta salad. I would up paying the dollar or so more for the antipastatification, but wound up getting just a regular salad. When the put my small pizza in front of me I quickly saw it was enough for three people. I looked at Ms. K and she looked at me, but before we knew it our waitress had evaporated into the ether. I waited a few minutes before taking a slice because I was trying my best to flag our waitress down. She never came back. I couldn't complain about my salad, and I couldn't ask about my pizza. Apparently she just no longer existed. So I ate my two slices while Ms. K ate her food and we sat and talked for over an hour. Our waitress never came back. The hostess eventually refilled our drinks, obviously she was informed that our waitress died somewhere in the kitchen and took pity on us. Then like magic she reappeared long enough to drop off the check and blow right by us. Our bill was over fifty dollars, and we both drank water. What the? Not only was I charged for a large pizza, but the crack head threw on an additional large pizza and a sausage sandwich. Nice. After another thirty minutes we were able to get our waitress to come back to us. This was after many attempts at eye contact and then both of us giving up and waving our arms in the air. We tried to explain what was wrong with our check but she walked off and said, "my bad" before we could say anything. She took the wrong items off, but still had my pizza listed as a large. After sitting there ten or so minutes more we explained our situation to another waiter who informed us he'd have to speak to a manager about it to get permission to fix our bill. Then we watched him walk over to our waitress, stand at a computer for a minute, and then bring the adjusted bill to us. Never once did any manager get involved. Okay. So we just sat and talked for thirty or so minutes more. Our waitress refused to come near us again. She eventually sent the waiter back to our table and ask us if she could have her tip. Apparently she felt that something she did warranted a tip. I was worried he was coming to tell me that he wanted the pizza back since I got more than what I paid for. I swore I saw him reach for it but Ms. K said I was imagining it. Of course we tipped her because we do in fact suck. Not as much as her mind you, but we still do. We said our goodbyes in the parking lot and headed home.

5.21.07

Monday:

The Office makes me laugh, a lot. As I’m going to sleep Dido’s White Flag comes on the radio and it makes me think of Adam. It’s been years, but I’ll forever associate this song with him. Not just because of the history involved, but also because it pretty much describes how things were between us for so many years. I won’t lie and say I don’t wish he’d call me or email or anything one day out of the blue, even if I know it’s the best for the both of us if he doesn’t. Even if I know it will never happen.

may 13-may 20

Sunday:
Pretty much 99% of the day finds me on the brink of death. I try to nurse my poor little body back to health. I watch Catch & Release for the second time, then call it a day. A very full day.

Monday:
While I feel better than I did on Sunday, I find myself doing even less. I blame my job for this.

Tuesday:
I go into work a bit early to get some things done since I have to check out early for a two hour meeting. A two hour meeting with an hour drive to Cleveland, and an hour drive from Cleveland. I get some pretty suspect directions from someone at work so I call G on my drive to get the skinny on the best route. I use her as my phone a friend since where I’m going is relatively close to where she used to work. She gives me some choices, then sends me on my way. We plan to meet up later in the day for dinner, drinks, ice cream, a movie…any combination of the above. Determined to pick a movie that she will agree on I offer up a comedy (Blades of Glory), a romantic comedy (the Ex), a thriller (the Invisible), and a horror movie (28 Weeks Later). Surprisingly enough she votes for none of the above. I really thought I finally had her on this one, foiled again. We are determined to find a restaurant with an outdoor eating area, since that’s pretty much all we’ve been talking about for a month now. We also want to find some place half-way between us. These requirements seriously limit our choices. Luckily, at the last minute I remember Pancho’s up the street from work. I kind of remember them having a patio, but since I hadn’t been there in a few years I think it best that I call first to confirm. So I call and this little girl sounding voice answers…

Child: Hi, can I help you?
Me: Yes, I was just calling to find out if you have a patio there.
Child: Um…hold on.
(a minute passes)
A voice I swear is the same child like voice: Yes?
Me: Yeah hi.
Not the same child like voice: Um, can I help you?
Me: Yeah, I was just trying to find out if you have a patio there.
Child #2: Um, yeah.
Me: Great. Thanks. Bye.

G is pissed because our waitress neglects to inform us that it's Taco Tuesday. She's also annoyed by the fact that her two margaritas make up over 50% of our bill. o talk her into stealing the large margarita glass to make up for the pricey drink. As we get up to leave she begins to walk off with the glass to see if I'll notice. As my eyes grow wide she laughs at me. After our yummy, but slow service we decide to stop for some ice cream. It's still very warm and muggy at 9 p.m. so maybe a cone wasn't the smartest way to go. We lick the ice cream super fast but still manage to drop some on the sidewalk.

G: Thanks for dinner.
Me: You bet.
G: Wait, does that mean I have to put out.
Me: Ummmm, no. But the fact that you’re now covered in ice cream does make the offer somewhat more appealing.

Wednesday:
I spend the day watching Scrubs, 2 episodes of How I Met Your Mother (it got picked up!) damn cbs for dropping Jericho, and Little Children. It was disturbing, sad, tragic, heartbreaking and of course I loved it.

Thursday:
My sister arrives into town. We eat, chat and watch some tv. She fills me in on the excitement and terror of being a first time home owner. I quickly begin to fade and call it an early night since I have to be up for work in the morning.

Friday:
More quality time with the sister and the mom after another stellar day at work. Why does this work week blow so hardcore? More eating, more chatting, more tv viewing.

Saturday:
I get a text from Chels telling me that they found Chloe earlier that morning. She had been sick off and on for a bit, but it looked like things were turning around. We decide to head to my sister's favorite ice cream establishment for some tasty treats. I tell my sister about my idea for a new HGTV show, Guerrilla Design. You don’t want anything done to your house, no one nominates you, however people just randomly show up to attack your house and do a major remodel and then leave. She laughs and tells me that Guerrenovation would be a better title. I tell he I'll think about it. We catch up on the Soup and Best Week Ever and laugh pretty hard at both. We do our best to make it to 11:30 to check out Zach Braff and the dreamy Adam Levine on SNL. My sister makes it until weekend update, then calls it a night. I do my best to suck it up and make it to the end. Somewhere between 12:40 and 12:50 I pass out. I wake up long enough to see Maroon5’s second song, then fall asleep again. I awake at 1:15, turn off the tv, and give in to the sweet sweet slumber.

Sunday:
We decide to have an early dinner at Luigi’s! Fifteen minutes before the restaurant even opens people are beginning to line up outside. My sister begins to stress while we are sitting in the car waiting for the doors to open. She convinces us to get out and wait at the door. Of course she is right, because by the time the place finally opens it's pretty much filled. We make friends with some Buffalo peeps while waiting for the place to open. They seem blow away by the idea that a line has formed outside of the place before it even opens. We catch a matinee of Georgia Rule. Wow. As I told my sister, lately I’ve seen a number of movies with seriously messed up characters, but the majority of them had at least one redeemable quality. Something that makes you end up liking them in spite of their flaws. Lindsay Lohan’s character in this movie was a HUGE exception. I hated her from the moment she came on screen, and things went downhill from that point. What a bitch. As my sister pointed out, she didn’t really feel like LL was even acting. It was as if someone wrote the character for her, about her, and shot her life story. The mormon boy was cute, but even that wasn’t enough to save it. And the soundtrack seriously rocked, but I really wouldn’t have liked this dud even as a rental. But my mother was happy with it, and since this was her belated Mother's Day celebration I guess that's what counts.

may 5 - may 12

sunday:
I meet up with Jules for our monthly breakfast and a movie thing, which curiously now goes down every other month. We swear we want to try better. This month’s installment goes down at Friendly’s. Who knew they were open for breakfast? Who knew it would be seriously that delicious? I order the four cheese omelet, that wins me over with the inclusion of pepper jack cheese, holla! I fill Jules in on the disturbing Disturbia movie event. She informs me that the bitches would have been sliced had she been there. Our movie choices are: Blades of Glory, Fracture, and I think that was it since Vacancy is no longer an option. So we go with Fracture. I heart Ryan Gosling, so I was okay with that pick. He and Anthony Hopkins both do a great job acting with what little they had to work with. While I didn’t hate it I would have been okay with renting it. What can you do? Jules was pretty impressed with the fact that I called the “twist” very early on in the movie. After I get home I hunker down for a three episode Scrubs-a-thon and get all caught up. How do you make one of my favorite shows, which is already insanely awesome, even better? Add a little Keri Russel! Hey, that’s always been my motto: everything is better when you add a little Keri Russel. I catch up with my sister and fill her in on my life, which basically just involves me reading paragraphs from this blog. Kidding.

monday:
I get a text from my sister telling me that she and her boyfriend became homeowners.

Sis: Holy crap, we bought a house!
Me: You’ll have to go out to celebrate. Are you freaking out?
Sis: Totally freaking out, I can’t tell whether we should celebrate or puke!

Some tv is watched, very little else happens on this day in may.

tuesday:
It’s 83 outside and I couldn‘t be happier. I’m rocking the new sunglasses pretty hardcore. I swing by chris’s for a haircut. This time, for like the first time ever, we both remember which blade attachment was used the previous time. I attempt to text G to fill her in on the night’s activities at the very moment that she texts me to ask me what’s going on later that night. After I watch the latest episode of the King of Queens I head north to pick up G. finding that it is still insanely warm I drive on the expressway with the windows down and the music very much turned up. At one point I am laughing very hard when I come across an old country song that was popular our senior year of high school. Do I turn it down or change it for fear of embarrassment? No I do not.

As I knock on G’s door I discover that I’ve missed a text message. It’s from G telling me to just call her when I get there so I don’t have to walk up the 3 flights to her place. We laugh at this because it’s something that would have happened on Three’s Company. Okay, I’m totally making that up. She tells me that she heard a car honking and wondered if that was my way of letting her know that I was in fact there. I assure her that it wasn’t me. And off to Cleveland it is. I love how we don’t really know where we’re going, can’t really make sense of the directions, so we just decide to wing it. Ehh, we’ll find it eventually. We travel several different directions on the city’s streets and eventually make it to an intersection where we see a car plow into the shirtless guy on a bike who is crossing in front of it. Well, we don’t actually see it happen, we hear tires squealing, see brake lights, see a bike fly in the air, and eventually see a guy stand up from in front of the car. I ask G if we should stop and she insists that we don’t. Such the good Samaritan that one. As luck would have it I look up and find the House of Blues one block over to my left. We snake our way through 100 orange barrels and find our way to the parking garage. $15?!? It was $5 the last two times I parked there. I am outraged at the injustice, but park there all the same. We discover that Bone-thugs-n-harmony are playing in the other room. G asks me what song they sang that was popular and I assure her that there is absolutely no way that I would know this information. So we stand in line with a million little kids all going to the bone show, and seriously look out of place. As we stand there, G slowly remembers the song, bit by bit, and sings it to me. We finally get in the building, after close to an hour of waiting in line, only to discover that our doors aren’t open yet. We are then instructed to wait in a second line. A line of like ten people. G is not happy about this. Not happy at all. I try to cheer her up by telling her that we went from being the oldest people in line to the youngest in this new line. She is not having any of that. We witness a cop flirting with an older lady in front of us, then handcuff her, then take her for a spin around the block on his motorcycle. A guy in front of us talks about seeing Guster live a few years back. G thinks he said Gus Turd and wonders if I like “him”. After laughing at her I explain that he is a they, and in fact not a turd. Ten minutes after the concert was to have started we are all still waiting outside and G begins to worry that Cary Brothers will come out and start singing and be sad because he’ll think no one came to see him. Then she tells me to look at a lady with a banana bag and I have no idea what she is talking about. I scour the crowd for a lady with a bag containing a bunch of bananas. Then she points and says, “no her bag is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.” Again I laugh at her. While waiting we see a serious overabundance of lesbians and realize that the lesbian niche left vacant by Natalie Merchant and Lilith Fair has now been filled by Brandi Carlile. We finally make our way inside and make it a few feet away from the stage. G gets reunited with a beer and grows happier. We witness a large group of 50-somethings grow increasingly drunk right in front of the stage next to us. They talk the ENTIRE time Cary Brothers is attempting to sing. At three different moments the 20-something girls who are standing directly behind them, who actually want to see a concert, attempt to start a throw-down with the elderly crowd. Our eyes grow wide each time. Brandi comes on stage and blows everyone away. She is just, wow. The girl knows how to rock. My suspicions that she too is a lesbian are reaffirmed that night with the amount of women in the crowd telling her how hot she is. She continues to toss guitar picks into the crowd and at one point one falls by G’s feet. I joke and yell out, “there it is.” and of course G bends down, casually picks it up, and hands it to me. The crowd around her then spends the next ten minutes searching the floor for it. G’s stealh-like, much like a ninja. After the show I walk over to Cary Brothers to tell him how much I enjoyed his performance. We then make our way out of the building to discover a sorority girl selling mini pizzas for $5. G of course wants one, my promise to stop for food simply isn’t acceptable to her. So we walk down the street as she eats her pizza. “Do you want some? It isn’t good, AT ALL,” she offers. As tempting as that sounds I decline. A homeless man asks us for money, he tells us that he is needy. I inform him that G is unemployed and I am stuck at a dead end job, I ask him who the real needy person is. He keeps walking. I am then approached by another man attempting to sell me a diamond bracelet for "my lady", I smile and say no thanks. G is fascinated with my radio the entire drive home since it says who the singer is and the name of the song. We station hop for the next hour and find ourselves singing to a vast array of things. I drop her off then make my way to the steak-n-shake to gets me a shake. Yum.

p.s. to the much shorter Mat Kearney looking mother-fella with the painter’s cap slightly cocked to the side, a little stubble, tight t shirt, baggy jeans, flip flops, with the hairy forearms and the gold ring on your right hand (I know, but I’m willing to look past that), who yelled at the talking people, got excited when Cary Brothers played a song from Sixteen Candles, then pushed your way to the front, and spent the entire concert hoping up and down and bouncing around…I think I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. I noticed that you were at the show alone. Just give me a call and we’ll fall madly in love within the week, then you’ll never have to go to another concert alone.

wednesday:
I text G to tell her that the song I was telling her about on our drive home from the concert the night before, Umbrella, came on as I pulled out of her place. I told her that I was going to call her but then remembered that she didn’t have a radio in her apartment. I myself would die without one, but she’s made it for four years. Four years! She mistakenly reads the text and thinks that after I left her place I went to this club called Umbrella where I heard the song I was telling her about. She even asks a neighbor if they have ever heard of the club Umbrella, and they assure her that they have not.

In other news, I’m so happy that the new people who just moved in behind me have a dog. I love waking up after just four hours of sleep to the sound of their beast barking. Even better is the fact that I’m unable to go back to sleep. They also have a mean little bitch of a child who screams at the top of her lungs. This promises to be fun.

It is Wednesday, but after my credit card bill last month and paying $45 dollars last night for two tickets and parking, I decide to hit the theater rather than the mall. Spider-man 3 it is. After reading Kia’s rave review of it I contemplate just waiting for it to hit the $1 theater at the end of the summer, but at the last minute I decide to forge ahead. Of course I liked it since we rarely agree on anything outside of Teen Witch, Popular and Roswell. I get her complaints of it, but none of it really bugged me that much. I thought it delivered on what it was: brainless summer eye candy. “bad/emo Peter Parker” was a bit much, and pretty much failed/was awkward to watch, but everything else was fine. After the movie I met up with the mom to take her for lunch for an early mother’s day celebration.

With 28 Weeks Later opening Friday and the Lookout hitting the $1 theater, plus my mother’s desire to see Lucky You (I know) and Georgia Rule (again, I know) when my sister hits town, I have a lot to squeeze in the next week. Can it be done? I’ll keep you posted.

thursday:
Lost (yikes) Jericho (made me cry, the whole walking in on the dad lying there dead was a bit too realistic for my liking) that's how the season ended? And it might not be back in the fall? So not cool. I haven't seen an injustice of this nature since Invasion left us hanging last year.

friday:
Of course I get stuck at work for like forever, thus thwarting my plan to catch an early showing of 28 Weeks Later. I plan to hit the theater Tuesday (free popcorn day!) after work for a matinee only to remember that I have a meeting for who knows how long after work. Damn the man. Have I mentioned that I hate my job? Mainly just in the summer. After work I pick up my mother so we can hit the hardware store to pick up her new door. She treats me to some DQ as a way of saying thanks. I get all caught up on Grey’s Anatomy and the Office. G sends me a text to see if I’ve watched this week’s Real World episode yet. She informs me that she thinks they are all whores, and that she hates Collie especially because her name looks like a dog breed. I tell her I don’t think the editors like Brooke very much because this week’s installment was not very flattering to all that is the Brooke.

saturday:
A blur of drunkenness, and pizza.

April 29 - May 5

sunday:
Lisa calls to tell me that she’s running late. I panic a bit, we have a little bit of a drive ahead of us, plus dinner, and I can’t miss one second of patty. I arrive at her place and she’s ready, and we head off. My nerves are put to ease. I play a patty mix for her so she can see what she’s in for. I assure her, that contrary to what her one friend told her patty is not a christian rock singer. The weather is insanely beautiful. The drive down through all that country and farm land is amazing. We arrive in the city in a little over two hours. We decide to swing by the venue to make sure we know where it is before we eat. Then it’s dinner at the spaghetti warehouse, better than the last time I was there. Lisa begins to grill me while we wait for our food. She asks me why I don’t wear any jewelry, she believes this would be more of a sign to others that I’m gay. I raise my arm to show her that I am in fact wearing a bracelet. She tells me that I looks more like a piece of string. I tell her that it is in fact a piece of string. She laughs. She then begins to ask me what kind of guy I would consider dating, running down a list. I reply with, “listen, I’m pretty desperate at this point. Beggars can’t be choosers.” at this I believe that she will choke to death while laughing at me. We laugh and joke and eat too much salad and pasta. I fear that the gallon glass of water that I drank is causing the pasta to expand in my stomach.

We make our way into the theater and I begin to freak out. I can feel my heart racing the closer we get to the stage. It’s one of the tiniest theaters I’ve ever been in so our row 9 seats are closer to the stage than I expected. The opening act was odd, and I still have no idea what their name was. I was pretty sure the guy said, “hi we’re Dean & Deluca and we’re about to take you on a musical journey.” so I just refer to them as Dean & Deluca. And I’m pretty sure the phrase a musical journey has never led to anything good. This time wasn’t an exception. They were late because they didn’t know what time they went on and were in fact five blocks away eating. Yeah, they could have just stayed five blocks away. Finally Patty comes out and I can’t stop smiling and my eyes water a bit. No tears were shed, but at this moment I came pretty close. She sang close to one million songs. Lisa said she was trying to count them all, but eventually lost count. I went there hoping to hear "Forgiveness", "Christina", and "Burgundy Shoes". I knew that no matter what she sang I wouldn’t be disappointed, but those three songs would make me a very happy boy. She sang so many great songs, and they all sounded just as amazing live as they do on her cds. While she didn’t sing "Christina", I did hear the other two. She is a tiny woman, in very high heels, who can seriously wail on a guitar. At one point she ripped the place apart with the ending of “When It Don’t Come Easy” which quickly bled into “No Bad News”. by the time she was done with both I thought that everyone in the place was going to have a mental breakdown at the very same moment. People went crazy screaming and applauding for a good solid minute. It sounds lame to say it was like a religious experience, but there were times that I was freaking out under my skin at how powerful her voice was. That’s really the best way I can describe it. The guy across the aisle from me was bouncing up and down and beating on his legs to the beat of some of her songs. Normally I would think that a person doing something like this was a freak, but I knew exactly how he felt. I’ve never been to a concert where the entire packed crowd is 100% silent the entire time the artist is performing. I heard a quarter drop at one point. And the applause after every song went on for an insanely long period of time. Every one there LOVED her and she kept thanking us over and over. After the show we drove around town a bit looking for signs of life. Sadly, most places seemed kind of empty. It was a Sunday night, but for a college town you’d think there would have been something. I was kind of tired myself, so maybe it was for the best. I fought off sleep for the drive home as lisa entertained me with many of her tales as she’s known to do. A) the girl has lived, you can’t deny that. B) she never runs out of new stories to tell or things to share, this blows my mind. I wind up getting home and crawling into bed around 1:30. Since I usually get up around 3, I’m very glad I decided to take the day off of work.

monday:
With some free time on my hands I decide to help my mother paint her living room and hall. I work on the tan for a bit, and just enjoy a lazy day off from work.

tuesday:
I finally check out the queen I got from netflix. That was such a great movie, I really felt bad for her by the end of it. They were very successful at making her into a sympathetic character by the end of that movie. I decide that the day calls for a blizzard from the DQ. I ordered a large, paid for a medium, and was handed a small. I mean what the?

wednesday:
I wake up to some sunshine and am dying to rock the new shorts and flip flop combo. I’m glad I did. The forecast called for low sixties and wound up being seventy-two and it was muggy as a mother out there. Found a sheet set at kohl’s. it was originally $75, marked down, then I rocked a coupon plus my kohl‘s cash, and walked out of there paying only $15. Why? Because I’m awesome. Then I checked out hot fuzz. It took forever to start, was funny and witty (not much of a shock there), but I didn’t laugh non-stop as I did with shaun of the dead. I’d rate it as matinee worthy, worth more than the price of a rental, but not worth a full priced ticket.

thursday:
Work is rough. I put in close to 10 hours without so much as a break. I feel my impending nervous break down coming along nicely. My plans to work on the tan after work are thwarted, I run to the bank, come home and check out Lost (it’s both good and bad since it mainly revolves around Sawyer, the good, and Locke, the bad). I’m still working through my second attempt at ordinary people, the book not the movie. The movie I love and have seen three times. The book is harder to get into.

friday:
Work, again not so great. At least today was only 9 hours. A text from Nikki lets me know she made it safely to her new town. I don’t think I realize yet how much I’m going to miss her. Maybe I’m trying not to think too much about it. A text from Chels lets me know that her job is trying to kill her. And a text from Keara informs me that she’s at our Dave & Busters, the place where we had our first date and subsequently fell in love. All of this goes down while I’m mentally creating a summer mix while working on my tan. I’m one multi-tasking mofo.

saturday:
Catch up on Earl, the Office, Jericho (which is getting so intense I almost can’t watch it. Now I want a second season). Pizza, of course. A couple beers, and I am out. Literally, I fall asleep way too early in the evening.

April 22-28

sunday:
an early start. some tv is watched, dave lieberman is the typical way i begin my sundays. i decide that this summer will be the summer of my tan and kick things off by sitting outside with my book for a bit. i catch up with the sis on the phone. basically, it's just a lazy sunday.

monday:
while in a metting at work lisa calls me. at first i worry that something is wrong, but she just called to say hi. i explain that i'm in the middle of giving a presentation and i'll have to call her back. she says okay and then asks me why i'm going to cry at the patty griffin concert. she always knows how to make me laugh at all of the wrong times. again, no cable tech. bastards! but magically the problem that was only under this roof, becomes "area wide", and then appears to be fixed. we now have LOGO! it appears that very little in the way of exciting is on this network, but it’s nice to see that it’s now an option. i attempt going to bed, but somehow wind up reading 55 more pages of the road. i’m beginning to wonder if i’ll ever know for sure what happened. i hope i don’t get mad and throw the book across the room like my sister did with the devil wears prada? (she hated one book so much that she tossed it across the room, maybe it was she’s come undone?)

tuesday:
a not so great day at work, it was bound to happen, i’ve had too many good days in a row. i just kept chanting, "i hate you all i hate you all", while it didn’t really help anything it made me feel better. mr. wonder is a beautiful, beautiful man. i find it hard to stay focused when he’s around. another sunny and warm day. i drive home with the windows down and the sunglasses on. speaking of, i plan on finding a new pair while shopping the next day. i get home and sit on the lanai, how very golden girls of me, and work on the tan whilst reading a few more pages. i finish disc 1 of dante’s cove. the camp factor is off the charts, the acting took a bit of a turn. while the overabundance of eye candy is hard to deny, i think i’ll hold off on the next disc for a bit.

wednesday:
i don’t want to leave the house for i am this close to finishing my book. that’s both good and bad. good because i can’t wait to find out what happens to them. bad because i have nothing lined up to read next. but i head out all the same. it’s wednesday, so that means spending money that i really shouldn’t be spending once again. the mom and i hit target and i just pick up a couple of cards. next is kohl’s where i find some more sexy underwear, some socks, some kick ass sunglasses (see, i told you), and a stuffed cars thing as a joke for chels. next up is macy’s where i swear i’m not going to buy anything. i even refuse to look at the men’s stuff knowing how weak my self-control is. so of course i wander into bedding, while my mom is looking for some new towels. and of course i find something i can’t live without. i mean what the hell is my problem? i just redid my bedroom like two years ago, and here i was buying a new comforter. but, it was $200 and i got it for $34, i mean come on. how could i not? plus i dubbed it my spring/summer look and told myself the other one would be fall/winter. then we went paint shopping at homodepot for my mom. after that was some seriously delicious lunch at max & erma’s and then a stop for some ice cream. the sign mislead us into thinking the large had two scoops when in fact it had more like five. i feel sick. i finally call B back and catch up for a bit. excited and scared, the big move is a few days away. i call lisa to set up the plans for sunday, road trip and patty! then call ms. k back and catch up on movies, books and tv among other things.

thursday:
the day from hell at work. i saw someone freak out, then quit. yikes. very little went right, and i tried my best to convince myself to walk out as well. for different reasons. i came home to a new episode of Lost, so things did improve somewhat.

friday:
i came home from work and told myself that i had to finish the road before i was allowed to go outside and play. finish it i did. i’m not gonna lie, it kinda sorta broke my little heart. i don’t know why i wasn’t expecting it, but i didn’t really prepare myself for that ending at all. i spent an eternity trying to decide what to wear. the weather, being in a constant state of flux, is messing with me every chance it gets. too warm for a sweater, too cool for my beloved flip flops. begrudgingly i headed out in my awesome new brown shoes rather than the flip flops. as i made my way up north jules called me to get the skinny on the evening’s activities. she tells me that T & J are coming, and i’m not sure what to make of this news. i need time to prepare for things like this, and the thirty or so minutes that i have simply won’t cut it. she informs me that she found out she has a class to teach earlier than she realized the following day and therefore won’t make dinner. she thinks drinks after is still an option, she promises to keep us informed. i make it to the restaurant a bit early so i drive around to kill some time. after two detours i decide to just go to the restaurant and see what’s up. as i attempt to find a parking place some fool almost backs into me, turns out it was B. haha. he and nikki are there, so we wait for a table together. i get asked to be in the wedding! so we sit and wait and chat a bit and i look up and see T & J coming in and i get a little nervous. we hug, we say hello, we catch up, and it turns out to be a lot of worry for nothing. ms. k and scott show up and we find ourselves a table. we eat, we talk, we laugh, we reminisce for two hours and it feels like 1995 all over again. T announces that it feels like the last episode of 90210 to her. my plan is to bail on drinks since i have to be up at 3am and the drive is way too long for any of that business. it turns out that everyone else is calling it an early evening as well, i picture jules about to meet up with us only to discover that there’s no one to meet up with. as we stood outside the restaurant hugging and saying our goodbyes i look up to discover our junior high gym teacher walking towards us. we all freak out as he passes by us, like he’s a celebrity or something. we were all too much in shock to even say anything to him. i contemplate running up to him and asking him if he still forces young boys to play pin ball. aka running the risk of suffering from a form of mild retardation. i of course screwed myself by being an amazing pin guard once, so i was forever chosen as the pin guard from that moment on. it really hurt. after revisiting the wonder years these past few weeks, and then our dinner reunion, seeing coach b somehow seems fitting. i head home smiling.

saturday:
i have some pizza, how unusual i know. i get caught up on grey’s anatomy, 30 rock, and two of the four scrubs i have on the DVR. keara calls me to inform me that she met jimmy on the streets of NY. i find myself asleep at 9 something on the couch, and then officially call it a night at 10:30 when i head to bed. i want to be well rested for patty and the road trip the following day. lisa thinks I’m joking her when I keep texting her that i will be bawling like a little baby the moment patty steps on stage.